Johnny Jet: Fear of Flying

Fear of Flying
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"Cabin crew - doors to automatic",
Words guaranteed to make you panic
Words guaranteed to make you sweat
Strapped in trapped inside this jumbo jet

Going by air was a very bad decision
So I've decided to adopt the crash position
Just in case the flight doesn't last very long
In case the Wright brothers
Got it wrong
Statistics say it's safe, but statistically speaking
There's a very good chance of my underpants leaking
No I wouldn't say I'm frightened, I wouldn't say I'm scared
But when I've left my seat, I wouldn't sit there

Now we're on the runway, we're going faster
We're trying to avert an underwear disaster
Yeah Lord I'm ready please take me up to heaven
And back down again in this seven forty seven

But "Cabin crew - doors to automatic",
I wonder if the Captain ever said that
On the Titanic?